I believe mothers ( in my era) had the largest influence on children growing up, but in today’s world is that true? With single moms, working moms, has a choice of babysitters , kindergartens factor in on what influences children? Does the father have the most influence on children? Being a person sitting on the outside I really do not have an infinitive answer. Chime in and let me know what you think? Fill out the contact form and let me know.
All I can tell you is what my father did to influence me. He was a driven man. When I was young, I watched how he went about doing things and how he taught me how to do things. His motto was plan, do it right the first time, leave no doubt about why it is done a certain way. Be meticulous! Many times he made me redo projects because it did not reach his expectations. Contact an expert if you needed help. In later years I would go to him for advice. When I wanted to marry my wife I asked him for permission, how to ask her, how to tell her parents. He gave me strength and confidence in my decision. He was supportive with my decision even though I was serving my county in the arm forces. I would go to him when I needed moral support when running my own business. He was never critical (which was a pleasant surprise) and supported my decisions with a caveat; did you get expert advice on your decision. Meaning his mat not be correct.
In later years he would loose his ability to give good advice. Deteriating health made life difficult for him. From a non expert point of view, how youraise a child is the largest factor in influencing children. Are you there for your child in times of need: when the child succeeds, when he or she fails. When they are in trouble do you listen or make your own decision on what he or she did wrong. Do you investagate why he started an argument or fight. Do you watch how he or she does his or her homework. So many things influence a child so a parent needs to be a policeman, fireman, psychologist, friend , disciplinarian, all rolled in one. Such a difficult loving task you parents must have. And yet you need to roll with your mistakes and be the supportive influential persons in your child’s life. It must be hard to be objective but the proff is in the pudding. Did your child grow up to be an intricate part of society. Working, happy family or happy as a single well adjusted individual. Do they keep in contact and come to you for child rearing advice or just to say hello.
Sometimes your influence is manefested in the way your grown child lives. How he or she cleans the house or does a project. How they raise their children. Can you see them as a reflection of you? Again I am by no means an expert on influencing children. I remember my Father, his influence on my life. My sisters raised their children without husbands. They have children who are great moms and dads. Who is to say who has the most influence. In my case it was my father. In their case my sisters had the greatest influence and I am very proud of them and their kids.
The Old Man
He was an electrician by trade,
A union man made,
Born in Kansas City,
Tough, stout, and gritty.
Took nothing from any man,
Loved only one woman,
Spoiled his daughter,
Made his son strong
So he did not falter.
Worked hard all his life,
When it caused too much strife,
Unforgiving when he felt wronged;
He felt this was being strong.
He worked on the Golden Gate Bridge,
Hanging lights over the edge,
Hanging three hundred feet over the water,
Hanging free without any shelter.
He was a man I admired,
His arrogance made you smile,
He was my best friend’s dad,
Whose son affectionately called him
The old man.