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Where the rooster Crows

It is four thirty A.M. The rooster crows a little early. Normally it crows at five. Maybe it is because there is not a cloud in the sky. The sun is up asking us to start our day. The birds are singing and the dogs are barking, but oddly the monkeys are silent. Have they moved to trees in another area? The neighbor with his atv is on the road. He likes to make sure we know when he is leaving. It is a loud machine.

Yesterday we had a heavy rain. Today is clear and blue, a wonderful day for the park. We will drive down to lake Arenal and spend part of our day there. The dogs will love it. It is cleaning day today. We hire a house cleaner once a month for three dollars an hour. Sonya will clean the house emmaculately. Much better then we do. She will do laundry if you wish and change the beds.

There are more large trucks in the area now. It is not as quiet as it used to be. The little town is growing. More building that brings steel, concrete and building supplies. Which brings dump trucks, tractors and graders to start home building. As the town grows so does noise. One of the reasons we bought property away from the Frey. We bought a piece of property in San Luis, a town outside Tilaran, Costa Rica. Up in the hills away from noise central. It has a beautiful serenity and a great view of the lake.

in Nuevo Arenal, the quiet is still present but interrupted by the big trucks during the week days. Today is no exception. It is wonderfully serene at the present time. Mister Dove is hooting for some loving and the little yellow birds are chirping away. A woodpecker is pecking away. Coffee is being made for Corina’s morning fix. Another beautiful day in paradise.

Pura Vida😎

The Quiet Little Boy

He was happy and carefree.
He made friends easily.
He had a freckled face and eyes of blue,
A smile that often subdue.

A mischievous lad but never malicious,
A little brother who loved red licorice,
He had a laugh that would make you smile.
Unfortunately, he would be with us for a little while.

My favorite memory is on a warm summer day;
He was curiously watching the willow trees sway,
His little head flowing with the trees
At peace, flowing with his own personal chi.

He closed his eyes and listened to the birds,
Swaying to what he heard.
He was a quiet little boy,
Intuitive and full of joy.

I watched him for a little while.
I couldn’t help it I had to smile.
Suddenly, he ran to the fence,
Turned around, and gave me a glance.

Smiling, he pranced around the driveway,
Laughing because I fell for his play.
He was a quiet little boy.
He was my brother, and I miss him in every way.

Love you, bro.

Pura Vida

Living in Costa Rica

Imagine waking up to rain most days. The sounds of Doves calling out to mate. A Geico    Crawling high on the window and your dogs barking at it. Cows being led down the main highway to pasture down the street. Granted it isn’t the freeways of Los Angeles, but it gets its fair share of traffic. Horses tied to a wire fence close to the highway or a saddled horse outside the neighbors house readied for its work day.

The sun rising over the mountain overlooking Lake Arenal with its bright orange hues as your girlfriend is making homemade raisin bread. Imagine the fragrance of fresh Costa Rican coffee and the smell of cinnamon and raisin as the loaf is cooking in the oven. This is what is like to live in Costa Rica. The flowerery fragrance of natures call. The effervescent takes over your senses and explodes in your being. Can you understand why I love it here?

In the early morning the people rise. I sit on the front porch and watch them walk by. Some are taking their kids to school, while others take the bus to work . The bus system is very good here and the people use it often. Most people walk or travel by bus. For senior citizens it is free and you always see ten or fifteen people waiting for bus.

As I sit and stare out at the lake. I hear the monkeys in the distance. A young man starts his motorcycle making the monkeys voice their disapproval of the loud noise. I awoke at five A.M. It is seven A.M.,the local grass cutters are out using their weed whackers to cut down the growth on the side of the roads. No heavy grass cutters here.  People do most of the work with picks, shovels and sledge hammers. The country tries to keep their people working. Not a lot of progressive machinery here.

A Toucan is high in a tree calling for some company. Reminding me to start my day. I became a resident a couple of months ago. I need to go to the clinic today and pick up my prescriptions. No cost to me. One of the benefits of being part of Caja, the national insurance I pay fifty dollars a month for. I need some money for the week and need to go to the bank. Corina and I wish to go to the beach this week.

Relaxed, smiling  and enjoying the good life. Pura Vida😎

May your life be grand!

Pura Vida

The Lonely Biker

“The Harley’s hallow rumble could be heard
As Mark rode through the trees and ferns
Listening to the many birds
Riding slowly as he observed
The magnificent beauty of Big Sur

Down the mountain to the ocean blue
He stops for a better view
He locks his bike to walk the sands”

Excerpt From: Timothy M. Nugent. “The Lonely Biker.” XlibrisUS, 2015-09-30T04:00:00+00:00. iBooks.
This material may be protected by copyright.

Another beautiful Day

Another beautiful day in Costa Rica. Do you wake up to the smell of fallen rain? It as if God decided to filter the air and give your senses a revived notion of what fresh is. The smell of green has a purified texture unlike the brown smell of Las Angeles. There the air is filled with toxic chemicals giving fifty percent of the young population Asthma.

Here the air is fresh and clean. My hope is it cleanses my lungs and the change in my diet cleans my organs and makes them work better. I eat a lot more vegetables and fruit and less red meat. A challenge for me because I love red meat. How about you? I have lost fifty-five pounds since I Arrived here. Over one hundred pounds in the las five years. Is that an incentive for people to make a life change.

My alcohol consumption has also gone down. I have no trouble finding beer and Tequila, my favorite drinks. I do not have the urge to consume it. Maybe because I worry less . Being retired helps. Not being in debt helps. Being far away from negative influences in my life helps. Having a solid ,trustful relationship with a good woman helps. Let us not forget my two dogs LaLa and LuLu whom give me a sense of calm.

All these simple life changes factor into a  better life. I love it here in The Lake Arenal area. No pressure, low crime and friendly happy people. Is it perfect? Perception is with the individual. If you want to look for the bad you can find it. I prefer to dwell on happiness and the invironment. To me it is perfect. Come check for yourself.

Para Vida!🤔

Another Great morning in Lake Arenal

Cumulus clouds puffy white Blue skies beautifully bright

A gentle breeze calling us outside

No reason to hide inside

My girls and I sit on the veranda

LaLa and LuLu sharing a banana

Corina sipping her Java Me, eating guava

We decide to go for a walk

Some time for us to talk

Exercise to strengthen our health

Energizing our stealth

Heading down the steep brick driveway

Huffing and puffing our way

Turn at the gate and head up the hill

Up we go exerting our will

To the top of a satisfying walk

Gasping almost unable to talk

We stop and take a couple of deep breathes

Time to sit down and take a rest

Take a drink of my lemon water

Happy we completed our walk and did not falter

LaLa and LuLu happy on our laps

Looks like they will take a nap

Another great morning in Lake Arenal

Arenal

Aguacate

I will miss Aguacate when Corina and I move into our new home. It reminds me so much about my childhood home. It is the neighbors I will miss. They have genuine concern for you. If something is out of norm for you they seem to know and ask if they can help you. They are private people and are not nosy but seem to want to help without asking for payment.

Do you live in this kind of atmosphere: fear free, no locked doors and neighbors who  care? Not since my childhood have I felt I belonged. I lived in California for fifty years and did not know my neighbors. In Las Vegas I did not know my neighbors unless they wished to complain about something. It made me feel, I did not want to know them.

Maybe I became reclusive and wanted to be left alone. Have you fallen into that kind of rut? If so take a month in a Costa Rica town and see if it changes you. Can’t speak Spanish, no problem the natives will help you out as long as you show them you are trying to learn. I still have a long way to go. I do not trust most people and can be reserve, but here in Costa Rica I am a more relax and  a less judgemental individual.

May you have a prosperous and uplifting day.

Pura Vida😀

 

Choice

My mind and body rejoiced

I finally made a choice

I decided to renew my life

Take Costa Rica in stride

I new it was a beautiful country

Would I find the people a mystery?

I found them hard working and gentle

Compassionate not brittle

Willing to teach you their language

Smile when your Spanish gives them anguish

They are generous with their time

Costa Rica and the people are sublime

I made my choice and never looked back

Happy I did not listen to my family who said I was whacked

I lost all stress and angst

Lost all anger and hate

Now my life is relaxed

No more anxiety attacks

I thank God every morning

For the woman that joined me

Costa Rica was a good decision

Beyond any simple reason

To leave the United States

And learn the Costa Rican ways

My mind and body rejoiced

I finally made a choice

Pure Vida!Vida!

Coffee

Do you like great coffee? You wake up in the morning and you must have a cup of Java or your a freaking maniac. It helps start your busy day . That’s my girlfriend. The whole world has to stop before she has her coffee. Amazing! I do not drink coffee and can not understand why I am put on hold while she drinks her coffee. Diffenately an addiction to caffeine. Luckily for me she drinks zero soft drinks. Could you imagine how hyper she would be if she did. It would drive me crazy. In her defense she only drinks coffee first thing in the morning and she motors on all day.

I patiently wait for breakfast . Once I got tired of waiting and she got upset because I started to fix breakfast. Oh my god, you would think I robbed a bank. She loves taking care of me but it is on her terms, coffee first. To appease my early morning nature she sometimes makes me hot chocolate . Nothing like hot chocolate and banana bread while I wait for her coffee fix. We get up early in the morning because she needs to get things done early. Her arthritis acts up and she is down for the count at two P.M. She tries her best but the pain for her is excruciating. There is not enough pain killers to ease the pain . Besides, she works at not using pain killers.

She loves the coffee in Costa Rica. She does not use a perculator. She uses a coffee press.  Pours hot water of the grinds, waits for it to settle and slowly lowers the plunger down. She loves it. On less electrical outlet that is used. I have to admit I love the smell of coffee . It makes her happy and starts her day off grandly.

Another great advantage living in Costa Rica. Great coffee and beautiful sunrises!

Pura Vida😎

Another Great morning in Lake Arenal

Cumulus clouds puffy white

Blue skies beautifully bright

A gentle breeze calling us outside

No reason to hide inside

My girls and I sit on the veranda

LaLa and LuLu sharing a banana

Corina sipping her Java

Me, eating guava

We decide to go for a walk

Some time for us to talk

Exercise to strengthen our health

Energizing our stealth

Heading down the steep brick driveway

Huffing and puffing our way

Turn at the gate and head up the hill

Up we go exerting our will

To the top of a satisfying walk

Gasping almost unable to talk

We stop and take a couple of deep breathes

Time to sit down and take a rest

Take a drink of my lemon water

Happy we completed our walk and did not falter

LaLa and LuLu happy on our laps

Looks like they will take a nap

Another great morning in Lake Arenal

Time travel

 

Late night

I can not sleep tonight. So many plans to be made. I am always busy in Costa Rica. May need to visit The United States next month to see how my girlfriends mother is doing. She had a major stroke and surprised us all. She is always active  and free spirited. You never know when something attacks your body. They say you have warning signs and should be alert to them. Go figure.

My mother died of a stroke and it took her a couple of angonizing weeks to visit the maker. I have a difficult time seeing people suffer this way. My wife died of a stroke caused by brain cancer. I wrote a short story about this experience in my life:

The Last Seven Days

Day One

It seemed like a normal week end morning. Marian had made some breakfast and we sat on our favorite love sofa. I wanted to watch the football game; so we decided to have a quiet morning. Her blue eyes seemed to be a bit brighter today. Later, she felt tired and decided to go take a nap. She was asleep for a couple hours when I heard her shout out.
I ran to the bedroom. She was sitting up crying and saying ” Honey I’m scared! I’m scared!” “Help me! Help m#*#*#”

Marian was losing her ability to talk. She was mumbling words.
She got out of bed, walked toward me, holding onto the bed rails for support. I grabbed a hold of her and took her to our couch. She was shaken and perspiring a great deal. Several times she tried to communicate but was making mumbled utterances instead of formed words. I called 911 and had an ambulance on the way.

Marian did not want to go. She kept saying ” No!”
One of the few words that came out correctly. She was afraid to leave her little castle: she had made it a place to escape. She was disenchanted in the world away from her sanctuary. The paramedics were great. They handled my wife with great care. I jumped in the front of the ambulance and we raced to the hospital with the sirens blaring. I could hear Marian crying out for me. I felt helpless as we head towards the emergency room at Kaiser Permanente in Antioch, California.

As we rushed through the doors, the nurses came running to us. I followed them into an emergency room. I held Marian’s hand, talking to her softly; reassuring her everything is alright. They took her vitals and took her to an M.R.I. Machine to take pictures of her head. I was allowed to hold her hand until she was in the machine, but then had to wait in the hall. I called my best friend. He and Marian were close. He couldn’t get there fast enough. I could always count on Steve.

I could not sit down and wait. It was the longest thirty minutes I ever lived through. Finally the nurses rolled Marian out on a bed. I gave her a kiss, held her hand and waited in the hallway. It seemed like an eternity.

Marian tried to talk to me, but I could not understand. I could see in her eyes how scared she was. It took every fiber of my body and mind not to break down and cry. I need to be strong for my baby even though I knew she was dying. Marian was my life for forty-one years. I knew in a few days I would be saying my final good byes.

Finally the emergency doctor came out to tell us the results. He gave Marian a shot. Something to help break the bad news. He said the news was not good. He asked Marian if she needed to hear it from him.
Good or bad. She nodded yes and he looked at me. I told him yes and moved closer to Marian to hold her head and hand. I told him not to sugar coat it. Marian would want you to come straight out with it. “I am sorry. Your brain is bleeding out. You have twenty- four hours to live. We have hospice care in the hospital and are setting up a room for you. I am sorry.”

Marian cried for a minute; then turned to me and said, ” call John now!” She smiled at me and said ” I love you!! It was the last time I would her those precious words. I kissed her and went to the outside. I called her brother John and broke down on the phone when John began to cry. He gave the phone to his wife and I explained to Liz that Marian only had twenty – four hours to live. You need to come immediately. Liz would call Marian’s siblings and my sister, who would call my family. Both families would race to Marian’s side. It took Steve ten minutes to get to the hospital. Probably breaking speed limit laws.

Steve would be with me throughout Marian’s death. He is a special person. Very shortly we would be taken to the hospice room. The care was phenomenal. They showed a lot of compassion towards my wife and I. They put a bed next to hers, so I could be beside her. Steve would stay most of the night. I had to tell him to go home. He refused to go. There would be no sleep that night. Her family would arrive early in the morning.

Day Two

Steve left at three a.m. He owned his own business and had to leave. He would catch a couple hours of sleep and go to the job and let the people know he would be leaving early. He was at the hospital by eleven a.m. to give me support. By seven a.m. Marian’s family arrived. John ,Rob, Kate and Fran would huddle around the bed. John and Rob hugged their sister. I stepped back and watched from a distance. John had an unfortunate accident. It left him unable to cope at times. He had to leave the room as he began to cry. Marian was a surrogate mother to the younger kids. Her mother was working as a secretary for her father so Marian spent a lot of time taking care of the twins(John and Fran) as they grew up. Marian was a remarkable person and gave her siblings lots of love and care. Rob spent a lot of time telling Marian he loved her and not to worry. Rob’s wife, Lisa leaned over Rob and tried to comfort her as much as she could. Liz, John’s wife is very similar to Marian. She is the kind of person who gives of herself without asking for anything in return. She new how to comfort Marian. Fran and Kate spent most of the afternoon with Marian. Taking care of her every need. I do not know what I would have done if it wasn’t for Marian’s family. They gave me strength.

Marian was diagnosed five weeks earlier. She had driven herself to her doctors’ office. She had double vision and a severe headache and managed to arrive there safely. Her doctor examined her and told her she needed to go to emergency. The doctor wanted her to take an ambulance
but she refused. Instead, she called my best friend Steve who dropped everything he was doing and took her to the emergency room. Once there, Steve called me. I was at work. To this day I do not know why Marian did not call me. I worked forty-five minutes away; I guess she thought I would take too long. I did not think it was important to ask her. I was happy she thought so much of Steve as to ask him for help.

I arrived at the hospital, Steve and Marian where in the emergency room. The nurse called out Marian’s name and we went in. Steve waited in the waiting room. I remember walking in to meet the nurse and doctors, I was nervous and apprehensive. The last five years had been scary for us.
She was misdiagnosed the last time we were at a hospital. We were told she was allergic to Ibuprofen. She had flu like symptoms and her body was swollen. We were given antibiotics. It seemed to work. A year later Marian developed the same symptoms. I rushed her to emergency. X-rays were taken and we found out the tube connected to the kidney was disconnected. She was being poisoned with waste products. They did a great job with the surgery, but was sent home with a staff infection. She almost died from this mistake. Three weeks later another surgery was performed to take out the infection. They cut out the infection which was four inches deep by twelve inches wide. I had to stuff strings of gauze in here stomach for three months until the opening would heal. They could not close it with stitches for fear of infection. You can understand why my hands were sweating.

They took her vitals and went in for X-rays and M.R.I. Marian came out of the X-ray rooms and it seemed like a lifetime before the Doctor came out. Finally we’re taken to his office and he explained the X-rays. Marian had a tumor over her left ear. It was almost two inches in size. He said he called the hospital in Redwood city and they had a surgical room reserved on Friday. There was no danger in waiting two days. Only apprehension, anxiety and fear. I lost a brother from brain surgery. He died at the age of twenty-one; after three surgeries over ten years. Marian’s surgery went well. Steve and I waited outside the recovery room and waited in the hallway as she was rolled out of surgery. She was awakened right after the surgery, saw me, and told me she loved me.

She never forgot to tell me she loved me. She was released from the hospital on Monday. She was dressed and ready to leave at five in the morning. She would undergo five weeks of chemo therapy. Her sister Kate would take care of her for that whole time period. I would have been lost without her. I was able to work and not worry about my wife. Kate would leave after Marian was finished with the therapy. A week later Steve would rush Marian to emergency.

I looked over towards Marian. Her sisters are laughing. Marian is smiling. The girls always had great rapport. Even when there was a great divide. They seemed to repair their differences and moved on in life. Marian
showed them the way. She lifts her head towards me and gives me a big smile. I walk over and spend a little more time with Marian as other family come into the room. My family has arrived.

My three sisters and nephew and his family arrive. They all give me condolences and love. I left Marian’s side once more and let them talk to
Marian. She can still say a few words and there is some laughter. She was close to my family, especially my nephew’s kids. She loved them as if they were her own children. It will be hard on the nieces. The nephew is a strong little boy but will miss Marian a great deal. I called Marian’s co-worker. There was a lot of strife at her job. Alice seemed to be the only one with loyalty and kindness to Marian. Alice said that others wish to say goodbye, but I said no. I hate hypocrisy! One minute your a friend, the next, you are stabbing her in the back. No thanks! I believe I would have lost it if they showed up. Steve was stationed at the door to keep the unwanted visitors out.

It is late afternoon and everyone has gone for dinner or has taken time at their hotels. John and Rob are at the visitors lobby. Steve is still with me. I am not hungry or sleepy. My wife is dying and I can not do anything about it. I sit and hold her hand fighting off the emotions. Steve puts his hand on my shoulder and says she is resting why don’t you get a bite to eat. I tell him thanks but I do not wish to leave her side. I told him to go home and take a break. I fall asleep. With my head on her arm. Maybe forty-five minutes. I hear Steve. He brought me a sandwich and a Doctor Pepper. I thank Steve and sit at the end of the bed and eat. It is the first meal I’ve had in forty-eight hours.

It is midnight and I am lying next to Marian. She is awake and I kiss and hug her. She turns her head and says love me. I am confused. Is she saying love me or do you love me? I am frighten at the suggestion and hug her tightly. She tries to hug me but does not have the strength. Then I hear a garbled thank you. I cry the cry nobody hears. Just tears, knowing my lover and friend will be leaving me forever.

Day Three

I grabbed an hour of sleep. Marian was sleeping quietly. Long breathes, like she was taking in all the air she could to survive this ordeal. I prayed to God all night to take her pain away. Why do you make this beautiful creature suffer? Did she have another life were she made people suffer and you gave her her own little purgatory the last five years? Marian woke at five- thirty a.m.. The nurse was giving her a new bag of morphine and a drug to keep her calm. She squeezed my hand to tell me she loved me. I talked to her about our vacations to Cambria and Pacific Grove, California.

Just a few hours from home. How we played scrabble on the beach and in our hotel rooms. Took long walks up and down the ocean boardwalks in Cambria. Searched the beach for ocean art as she called it. Rocks changed by the ocean: ocean shells left behind by it’s creatures. She looked for kelp and seaweed to make her baskets and decorate her gourds. We laughed because she needed a permit to take away the seaweed and kelp(cost $10.00). How we walked the bikeways in Pacific Grove to First Awakenings across from the Aquarium. We would stay at the Borg Hotel. It was our favorite place to stay,about one and an half miles to the restaurant. It had a view that was tremendous(only $150.00 a night)and only fifty feet from door to ocean. We loved going there.

I told her I loved her and family began to arrive once more. Her close friends began to arrive. Even Steve’s wife who was terribly sick gave me her condolences. They were in a middle of a divorce. It must have been terribly difficult for her to come. Marian’s best friends Linda, Chris and Kathy were there. Marian smiled when she saw them and they sat with her for quite a while. The room began to fill. There must have been fifty people there. Soon they began to talk about everything but Marian. Steve came to me and said the nurse on duty wanted to see me. I went to the desk and she said it was time for everyone to leave. She believed it was too much for Marian. I was in a glazed coffin. Oblivious of what was going on around me.
I went to the middle of the room and ask everyone to leave, except my immediate families. I thanked them for coming to see Marian and the kindness they showed. Every person passed by me and gave me their last condolences. Soon the room was quite. Only Steve,my sisters, her sisters and brothers and her best friend Linda stayed. Everyone stood by Marian’s bed for her to see. There was so much love in that room today. All the people who showed their love for Marian and it was done by word of mouth. It was amazing the reach she had even in death.

I sat next to Marian and put her hand in mine. The little smile was gone. Her eyes seem to be black instead of her sparkling blue. I felt an emptiness in the pit of my stomach. My legs felt faint as I realized she did not recognize me any more. Her breathing seemed to be more shallow. Her skin a little more cooler. Her color a little more pale.

My shoulders sagged a little more deeply. My sister rubbed my head. I stood up and hugged her. I told my family and hers they need not stay any longer. Marian doesn’t recognize you any more. Suddenly Marian sat up in bed and threw off her covers and started to take off her clothes. I asked someone to get the nurse as I gently laid her back into bed. The nurse gave her a shot and Marian fell back to sleep. She would never wake again. I asked the nurses to give her enough morphine so she would not be in pain. The nurse explained when people are dying they make one last effort to escape death. It happens when they are coming to the end of life.

Days four,five and six

My family went home. They had jobs they needed to return to. It was not necessary for them to stay. John and Rob stayed, but they sent their families home.Fran lived in San Diego and had a family she had to take care of. Kate took her home. Days four, five and six are blurry to me. I know John, Rob, Steve and Linda kept vigilance with me. We watched as Marian withered away. We did not sleep very much. We wanted to see her as long as possible. We were tired but not sleepy. We talked about Marian and realized how lucky we were to have her in our lives and what a vacant space there will be when she leaves us. I was alone at night. It was what I preferred. I laid down beside her and watched her chest go up and down.
Felt her body get colder and colder as her breathing became less and less.
Fifty breathes a minute on Thursday to thirty- five on Friday. Saturday morning it was at twenty a minute. My brothers kept up the idle conversation. Anything to keep the facts from breaking us down. Never was an anger word or a frustrating word said. Never a negative word was said about Marian. In forty- one years of being with Marian could I remember anyone saying terrible things about my wife, lover and friend. Opposite is true about me. I am sure there will be people waiting to lower the boom.
The brothers are sleeping and Steve went home to wait my call.

Day seven

My pulse is speeding up. My mind is going one hundred miles an hour.
What am I going to do? Her breathing is twenty breathes a minute. It is eleven p.m.. I can’t sleep. In my mind I ask Marian was I a good man to you? Did I keep you from harms way? Am I being punished for my early life with you? He is taking you at such an early age. We have so much to live for. So much to live for and I pass out asleep. I suddenly waken. It is twelve – ten a.m.. Her breathes are ten breathes a minute. I jump out of bed and get the nurse. She hurries over to Marian and listens to her chest. She steps back and says her breathes are five a minute. Gently she tells me she will expire in an half hour. I go wake up Rob and John and call Steve.
At twelve – forty a.m. On the twenty first of September two thousand and eight my wife’s life expires. John and Rob hug me and I tell them thank you. The doctor called the time of death and said we could stay for three hours more. My wife was gone. I kissed her cold lips and told her ” I will love you forever. Save a spot for me in heaven. Say hi to your mom and brother for me.” With that, Steve and I left the hospital. Steve drove me home and asked if I wanted him to come in. I said no thank you. I took my keys and went to the front door. I entered the house, turned around and locked the door. I could hear Steve drive off in the distance.

I went into the bedroom and put my keys on the vanity. I turned and saw our cold empty bed and cried into hysterics. There was no need to be brave anymore. My baby was gone. It was as if everything in the world went sour. I threw my clothes in the laundry basket and looked at Marian’s
Side of the closet. It was empty. I asked her sisters to take out all her clothes and shoes from the closet and dressers and do with them what you will. I could not bear to do it myself. They showed a lot of courage and followed my wishes. I began to cry again when I realized they never took the jewelry. That Christmas I would hand out the jewelry to my family. I kept only the wedding and engagement rings. I would take them to a jeweler to make a ring for me with her initials. I was afraid I would forget her. It was a constant reminder I had a wonderful woman in my life.
All night I went through her jewelry boxes. She had many great pieces. I remembered the fun we had buying silver jewelry. She never did like gold.
We had pieces from Cambria,Carmel,Monterey, San Diego, and Pacific Grove. She had a charm bracelet that must have weighed three pounds.
She would look at it from time to time remembering all of our adventures.

I stopped and took a shower. Went to bed and cried myself asleep. I would dream of my beautiful wife. She smiled and said “I love you ! Do not forget that I love You!”

Link below for bookstore.

You

Occupations in Costa Rica

Costa Rica is the place I chose to retire to. It is not for everyone. Before making any life changes, visit the place you wish to live and rent there for awhile. This was my fifth visit to Costa Rica. I knew the  first day I arrived this is where I wanted to be. Never the less I showed restraint. I visited several more times before I decided to stay and never look back.

Gringos can not find work here unless they can do a job a Tico can not do. It is how Ticos keep working without fear of foreigners taking away their jobs. You can start your own company and work it. Online business is popular in Costa Rica. Technology fields are popular as long as you own the business. Corina and I are planning to open a small farm and work it on our own. Small enough to feed our selves and raise chickens  and maybe a pig. Who would have known I would venture into such a business at my age. A lot of farmers out here.

My present business is selling my poetry books on line. It is a tough way to make money. I write several blogs and a newsletter. Any way I can to be seen by the public. All writers hope people like their work and hope people like what they write. This blog: tmnugent.com is more of a conversational piece. My hope is you will comment and get a discussion going on anything you like or about the blog I wrote. I hope you visit my website: understanding-online.com. A website dedicated to my books.

Superglideman2@wordpress .com is another blog. I am slowly changing the format of that blog. It was my first blog and I use it to promote my poetry. I put excerpts from my newest book on the blog. My newest book: Poems From Costa Rica is published. You can check it out at Xlibris.com author Timothy M Nugent or at Amazon.com.

May you have a great life!

Pura Vida

The lonely Biker button below

Life

 

 

 

If only you knew

Life is a roller coaster. One day is great ,the next is fair. If you surround yourself with great friends, they tend to hold you tight and carry you through the tough times. A good soul mate, weather a marriage partner or a significant other can help you guide through life’s maze.

A good family unity helps. At times family loses it’s togetherness. Relationships get strained and the ties that hold it together snaps. A couple of family members can break that family unity. Holidays become empty. Choices are becoming difficult when you are stuck in the middle of conflict. So you walk away and sever family ties . Now all parties are hurt and you become the fall guy. Hopefully, you have the strength to move on.

Why is it so hard for hurt feelings to be repaired? The axiom, time repairs all things, does not always come true in fairy land. People can be stubborn and foolish. Why is it so hard to remember the good things in life instead of the terrible judgements we make? Can you explain this to me?

May your life bring happiness and joy!

Pura Vida!

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Vida

If only you knew

If only you knew how to forgive

That family is all there is

If only you knew

The loneliness you brew

Anger is a useless emotion

Resentment is a useless solution

If only you knew how to forgive

Maybe your heart can begin to live

If only you knew

The split that grew

Because of pettiness and hurt

Isn’t time to convert?

Love is never ending

It is always in the process of mending

Grab my hand and hold on tight

The roller coaster is right

If only you knew

There is room for you

Futility

Why is it that human beings are prone to violence? Since the days of Cain and Abel, man has found reasons to harm each other. Can you explain this phenomenon to me? Now we wish to build walls and arm our selves. To protect ourselves from governments and neighbors we have the need for automatic weapons and concrete bunkers we call home.

Politicians lie, steal in the name of our universal good. Line their pockets with our cash and smile while we head to the poor house. Yet we elect them to guide us to Camelot asking for a fairy tale ending. When reality sets in and we are forced to the soup lines all we do is complain about the Futility of it all.

Explain it to me, please.

Crimsom Fields

I walked those Crimson fields with their white placards
Rows of heroes laid to rest in memorandum
I cried as I walked, as I search for brothers
Lies were told,  to band us all together

Flags upon their graves for patriotic splendor
Those same flags those heroes souls surrendered
They walk the grounds with ghostly hearts
Knowing they were a part

Lies and deceptions not known until they did depart
Politicians raise the bar for their lying hearts
Knowing the Warriors will lay
In the Crimson fields they paved

I I walked those Crimson fields with their white placards
Rows of heroes laid to rest in memorandum
I cried as I walked as I search for brothers
Lies were told to band us all together

Start of a new book. If this poem stirs you. Maybe my book  “Understanding will  do the sameSame.

 

 

 

 

Remembering Mom

Mom was a tough old bird. She was fiercely loyal, hard working woman. I remember when I was young, she was the matriarch of the household . She ran her house with a voice of stone. Dad was in charge of the business of life but mom ran the household business. Dad made sure the house grew. Mom made sure we grew strong and upright.

Her ability to cook three meals a day with desert and homemade bread for dinner was amazing. The only time she got a break was when we were in school. Then she drove us to school. Does that sound familiar? I was never disappointed. When I was in high school she took me to school and picked me up after sports practice.

Her day started at five A.M. and did not finish until ten P.M. If that isn’t a salaried position I do not know what is. Do you work that hard or is your job nine to five? That was seven days a week! I miss my Mom, if that makes me a mommas boy, I will carry the monicker proudly.  In her latter years she became fiercely independent. She had her own apartment and friends and wanted to live her own life. She earned that ,don’t you think? No baby sitting, only visits from her grandkids. My sisters did a great job of taking care of mom. Mom is gone and I miss her. I love you mom!

 

It Came to Pass

It came to pass; the grand old woman went to the great beyond.
All her subjects, her sons and daughters for whom she was fond,
Comforted her as she searched for the light,
Eased her pain to give her clarity and insight.

To search for those who went before,
Those whose stories were legends of lore,
Through the darkness of past pain she traveled,
Through the shadows of light bedeviled.

Soon the glare of white shown clear
Her three sisters she held dear.
Mother and father held out their hands,
Welcoming their daughter to the Promised Land.

Husband, with his head held low,
Asking forgiveness to rescue his glow,
Tarnished by years below.
With her wisdom, she would bestow.

Two figures step into the light,
The last to acknowledge her graceful flight.
Two brothers, her sons long traveled past,
Welcoming the grand old lady at last.

Her journey complete, a life well lived,
Her vessel quietly asleep, it gave all it could give.
It came to pass.
Her rest is eternity; a new life begins.

I will miss you, Mom.

From: Understanding

Timothy M Nugent

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